Childrens Transportation

Children's Transportation

Power Wheels Jeep
I'm going to say it right from the beginning. These things suck. The battery life lasts for about an hour, then you have to recharge. Hell, you cant even make it to the 7-11 and back for a pack of cigarettes in on charge. This Jeep is a deathtrap, notice how the child's head will protect the roll bars on a rollover. Good to see Power Wheels has its priorities in the right place. Next years version will include a 5 gallon gas tank and will get 2 miles per gallon, just like real Suvs.

Kawasaki Super Shock Dirt Bike
Do people even have a desire to buy this? C'mon, its a dirt bike with training wheels, how is a 6 year old gonna get air on that? The only compelling feature of this bike is the potential for the awesome suit to come with it, but no, it probably wont.

Chevy Corvette Pedal Car

OMFG is this thing hott. I wish I had one of these back in the day, I coulda cruised around the neighborhood pickin up hotties. Bonus: it also comes in Yellow.

Power Wheels Bubble Tractor

Yet another genius invention from the people at Power Wheels. "Wave the "dipstick" bubble wand to blow more bubbles, and lift the handle for a fun clicking sound." They call these features? What the hell?! When has anyone found a clicking sound to be fun? Watch your children not mow the lawn while they are assaulted with soap and glycerin. It burns the eyes! It burns the eyes!!

Inflatable Gorilla

I do realize that this isn't by any means children's transportation, however, I found it on my search and it deserves mention.

"Are you getting ready for a grand opening? Gearing up for a new sales drive? Organizing your town's monkey parade? Then this gorilla is perfect for you!!!"

Organizing a towns monkey parade doesn't seem to me like the kind of thing someone would want to advertise. Especially to neighboring towns. Sadly enough though, this is one of the key selling points

"This is the most conspicuous landmark you can imagine!! This giant gorilla is suitable to put in front of your shop, building roof, moving vehicles or exhibit spaces."

Moving Vehicles. I read this over and over and each time, my mouth drops. The Inflatable Gorilla Association of America actually advocates putting this large, intrusive structure on local roads and highways. If I ever make a blind turn into this bastard, I'm gonna shit my pants.


	Power Wheels Jeep I'm going to say it right from the beginning. These things suck. The battery life lasts for about an hour, then you have to recharge. Hell, you cant even make it to the 7-11 and back for a pack of cigarettes in on charge. This Jeep is a deathtrap, notice how the child's head will protect the roll bars on a rollover. Good to see Power Wheels has its priorities in the right place. Next years version will include a 5 gallon gas tank and will get 2 miles per gallon, just like real Suvs.
	Kawasaki Super Shock Dirt Bike Do people even have a desire to buy this? C'mon, its a dirt bike with training wheels, how is a 6 year old gonna get air on that? The only compelling feature of this bike is the potential for the awesome suit to come with it, but no, it probably wont.
	Chevy Corvette Pedal Car OMFG is this thing hott. I wish I had one of these back in the day, I coulda cruised around the neighborhood pickin up hotties. Bonus: it also comes in Yellow.
	Power Wheels Bubble Tractor Yet another genius invention from the people at Power Wheels. "Wave the "dipstick" bubble wand to blow more bubbles, and lift the handle for a fun clicking sound." They call these features? What the hell?! When has anyone found a clicking sound to be fun? Watch your children not mow the lawn while they are assaulted with soap and glycerin. It burns the eyes! It burns the eyes!!
	Inflatable Gorilla I do realize that this isn't by any means children's transportation, however, I found it on my search and it deserves mention. "Are you getting ready for a grand opening? Gearing up for a new sales drive? Organizing your town's monkey parade? Then this gorilla is perfect for you!!!" Organizing a towns monkey parade doesn't seem to me like the kind of thing someone would want to advertise. Especially to neighboring towns. Sadly enough though, this is one of the key selling points "This is the most conspicuous landmark you can imagine!! This giant gorilla is suitable to put in front of your shop, building roof, moving vehicles or exhibit spaces." Moving Vehicles. I read this over and over and each time, my mouth drops. The Inflatable Gorilla Association of America actually advocates putting this large, intrusive structure on local roads and highways. If I ever make a blind turn into this bastard, I'm gonna shit my pants.